Edward's secrete
by edward6234
Summary: Edward knew this women from years past and she needs him now! What will Bella think of all this and what is it that this women really wants from Bella's husband?
1. Chapter 1

Zatira

How I pronounce Zatira is: Zah-tear-ah.

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or any of that Stephenie Meyer does, but I do own Zatira Rose and Misha Rose.

Summery: Edward knew this women from years past and she needs him now! What will Bella think of all this and what is it that this women really wants from Bella's husband?

Bella's POV.

Its been a long day and at the same time very short. My daughter, Renesmee and I took a nice long hunt just outside the mountains. Of course Jacob would usually come with us, more to help with Renesmee. She doesn't really like hunting but the games Jake plays with her seem to help. He stayed behind this time only to help Sam. We are on our way back home to the perfect little cottage in the woods. It was the fairy tale gift that Esme and the others had created for Edward and our family. It wasn't long before I could hear the little sounds of our happy home. Using my shield I could hear Edward and I really wanted to hurry because I was missing him from the moment we left. I couldn't quite hear his words yet but the more I listened the more I could hear _other _sounds. A women! _She seems scared and panicked_….?

"Please! … Edward, please! I need you. …. You said if I needed you, I could come! Please Edward!" A strange women begged.

"ZATIRA!… I know what I said. You must understand there is a slight complication now. I have a wife now, Bella and our daughter Renesmee! I can't just…." Edward started but was cut off.

"Edward, please! It has to be you, Edward. Please!" Zatira begged him again.

I couldn't believe my own ears. I know what I heard but not what it meant. Edward never mentioned Zatira before and they seem to be old _friends_. I know Edward has secrets but we all have those, right? I was having a hard time concentrating and that almost always leads to my lack of control for my powers. This caused my shield to snap back to me and in my shock and confusion I froze. Nessie seemed surprised at my sudden stop and then the look on my face must have alerted her that something was wrong. She rushed to my side and reached for my arm.

"Mom? … Mommy what's wrong? Are you okay?" Renesmee asked in a panic.

"I … I think we should go see your Aunt Alice before we go home dear." I didn't wait for a response I just ran the other way.

"Mom? …Mom what is going on?" Renesmee asked as she followed me.

"I just need to speak to Alice" We ran straight in. "Alice!"

Alice was in the living room with Emmett, they were watching a game of some sort. No doubt Jasper and Emmett had a bet going.

"BELLA! … And Nessie! Welcome Home!" Alice squealed as she hugged both my daughter and myself.

"Hey Girls! How was the hunt?" Emmett winked at me.

"Nessie Dear, run off and play with uncle Emmett while Alice and I talk ok."

I grabbed Alice's arm and pulled her into the other room with me while Renesmee and Emmett ran outside to play catch. As soon as I was sure Renesmee wasn't listening I turned to a now worried looking Alice. How could I explain this? What can I say? What would make sense? I don't even know what I … what that…? I have no idea what is going on. I need to know what Alice knows.

"Bella? Is everything alright? … You seem a little frazzled." Alice said.

"Alice what do you know what some one named Zatira?"

"Don't know. Never heard of her before? Why do you ask Sis?" Alice answered.

"I … well I don't know but I think she has something to do with Edward. On our way home I heard, through Edward's thoughts, some women talking with him. He said her name was Zatira and that she couldn't be here because me and Nessie made it complicated? … She was begging him saying that she needed him and that he told her to come. I don't understand what happened or what was going on I just knew that I had to come talk to you. I had to see what you knew about this girl and what she has to do with Edward but you seem to know nothing and this seems to do me no good. I guess I'm sorry for bothering you and maybe we should just hang out here for a while right?" I wasn't calm nor could I be.

"Whoa, slow down Sis? What do you think is going on here? I mean I know what is sounds like but really … Edward? I'm sure its nothing to worry about. Why don't you and Nessie stay here until you calm down a little and then we all can go find Edward and get everything sorted out." Alice said too calmly for my liking.

I'm sure she is right though. I know Edward and I know that this all sounds kind of bad but it can't be as bad as I'm making it out to be. Right? … I know nothing is happening and that things are just fine and Alice is right. I know all this and more but I just don't see how I can stay calm when I know what I heard and the way it was said. I know I should know that everything is perfect because it is perfect. So, why I'm I still worried that I'm missing something?

…

Edward's POV.

I have been waiting for hours! … Bella, my lovely wife and our beautiful daughter, Renesmee went out for a hunt HOURS ago. I stayed behind to help Esme with a little surprise for both of my special girls but now its finished and I'm just pacing around this little cottage. It really was a perfect place for Bella and our family, happy, quiet, peaceful even, but without them it seems so empty and every sound echoes now. The pacing helps but only to slowly pace the time, missing them is something that will never change when they are away from me. No matter the length of time or the distance, Hell I miss Bella when she leaves the room to put our sweet Nessie to bed. Its always been like that with my Bella! So now I'm stuck here, pacing… I miss them so much and yet I feel like I should be doing something to pass the time. I know there are so many things I could be doing right now. I could go back and hang out with Emmett and Alice. Its almost an easy bet to make that they could both be bored and that could lead to something to do to pass that time. Sure it could also lead to a lot of trouble and in some cases a little jail time too but Hey its _almost _always fun. Almost. Oh well! It really doesn't matter. Bella shouldn't be too much longer. She said she wanted to be back in time to help Esme and Alice with new plans for the rundown house Esme wants to fix up.

_Knock, Knock! _

Some ones at the door? … I know that metal voice so I know that this could be a problem. I haven't seen her in years, many years and the last time wasn't that fun. Why would it be different now? Still I was the one that started all this it's about time I ended it! I opened the door and she was standing there looking heartbreakingly horrified. I can't simply just turn her away now. She looks scared out of her mind. I don't think I have ever seen her like this before! It was a shock to hear her thoughts so frantic.

"Edward!… I need you!" Zatira begged in a rush.

"Zatira… Its nice to see you again. I know something is bothering you but you can't be here now. I'm sorry!"

"Please! … Edward, please! I need you. …. You said if I needed you, I could come! Please Edward!" She begged again. '_I know its bad and I'm sorry I need you but please help me_?'

"_ZATIRA_!" I sighed. "I know what I said. You must understand there is a slight complication now. I have a wife now; Bella and our daughter Renesmee! I can't just…." She then cut me off.

"Edward, please! It has to be you, Edward. **Please**!" Zatira begged me again. '_You are the only one that can do it Edward! You know that, PLEASE! I'm begging for your help. Please_!'

"I know… Alright. I know you need my help come in and explain what's going on first then I can see if I can help you or not. It may not be as simple as before Zatira."

"All I need is a little help Edward, please. She needs protection and you are the only one I can go to!" She sounded stressed as she followed me into the living room of the cottage. '_It doesn't matter what happened late time. Edward that was my mistake. Please don't punish Misha for something that I could have prevented. Please Edward, help us. Help me_!'

"I don't blame you, or Misha. How is she by the way? Is she here with you now?"

"I have her in a safe place but it will only last so long Edward! I can't keep hiding her like this. Its not working they will find her and I can't allow that!" She grabbed my arm and pleaded with her eyes as well as her words. '_**Please**_!'

"I know Zatira. Just start by telling me what happened this time?… How did they find you? Who is it this time? And what exactly do you think that I could do that you haven't yet!"

"I knew it was bad! They were sure to find out someday, it wouldn't be hard. I wanted to protect her. What else could I do Edward! I was out hunting one night when I heard this scream. It was a _blood curling _scream. I followed the sound and found a women dying in the woods. She was dying from child birth, the baby was born and laid crying at my feet. I couldn't just leave the poor thing in the woods… alone! **It wasn't safe**! The mother died before I was close enough to help her so I took the child home with me. It was a little girl and _she was so beautiful_! She was innocent and alone. Once I got her home she didn't cry anymore. I cared for her, nurtured her, I raised her as my own, I even named her. A beautiful name for a beautiful girl. But even though I love her I knew they would never let me keep her if they knew. I hid her from them for 8 years now, but then they found out! I had to save her, to protect her! Edward don't you see I needed to find you to save her!" Zatira explained.

"Zatira, I know all about how you met and raised Misha. I even met her remember! … Tell me what happened? How did they find you? How do they know about her at all and exactly who are they?"

"The Elders Edward, you know how the old ones are! They will never trust her and they won't allow this from me. I need your help, Misha needs you. Please! They had a spy follow me on a hunting trip and I had to stop at the store for food for Misha. He told the Elders what I bought and they took a guess." Zatira said but her thoughts took a new turn. '_Did he say __**Wife**__? … Daughter! He wouldn't have,… couldn't have. Could he_?'

"Before you overload yourself. Yes I have a wife now and a daughter. She isn't like Misha but she's not what you think she is either. She is Bella's biological daughter. She is also _my _biological daughter. Its hard to believe and more so to understand but Bella was human while carrying our child. I turned Bella after to save her life. I have a family now Zatira. I'm sure you can understand the importance of keeping them safe as well. … I will do all that I can to help Misha but I will do nothing to risk my family nor yours!"

"OH Edward! That's wonderful" Zatira wrapped her arms fully around me in a tight hug, I couldn't help but chuckle as I hugged her back.

"I'm sure we can figure this all out so trust me then. Where is Misha now?"

"Just outside the shore close to the beach. I didn't want to bring her into Forks in fear that you couldn't help us. I didn't want her so close to your family." Zatira said as she released me.

"Zatira, this is very important. Which beach did you take her to! What was the name? Did anyone see you, see where you left her? Did you smell anything in the area that was a little …. Strange!"

"Edward! I know I have made mistakes before but I am not careless! … No one saw me hide her and what does it matter which beach. It isn't the right weather for too many humans to swim. As far as the smells, Edward everything is a little strange around here, for me that is." Zatira snapped at me, she only gets that way when she is defensive.

If I'm right then the beach does matter. It matters a lot! And If I am right then we need to get to Misha and soon. … Only Zatira could come here to hide Misha and pick the only area swarming with giant wolves that have been trained to kill vampires. The poor girl, Zatira doesn't even realize all the little mistakes she makes. Its hard to believe that she was able to hide for 8 years let alone run all the way here after being found out. But I guess the Elders never actually saw Misha, so what could they do really!

"Zatira … Take me to Misha now and when we get back here we will figure out our next move. If it is the beach that I think it is you must stay with me and do what I say no matter what. Is that clear! I mean it Zatira if I said stop you MUST stop!"

"I understand Edward! Thank you! Thank you so much Edward. I knew I could count on you." she said '_Thank you, you are the only one that could help us_!'

This was going to be a long day, and I thought my only worry was going to be how to pass the time waiting for my little family to come back to me. I don't understand how these thimgs always find us but one things for sure I hate it and really wish the universe would just stop and leave us be. I used to think of fate as a harpy something I could touch and wish complete harm on but now I think it may be something more like a small child with a sandbox. Ready to burry the hopes and happiness of my life! Just as I start to think things could be perfect and peaceful. It never seems to fail, I find happiness and the child digs a hole to crush it with. A twisted turn of fate now leads me down a path that I took many years before _only this time I hope for a slightly different outcome_.

…

Bella's POV.

I am much calmer now. After talking with Alice and then playing a little game of catch with Renesmee and Emmett I seem to have calmed down a lot. _Apart from the time when Emmett tried to convince my daughter that it would be fun to give mommy a scare by using Renesmee as the ball_. Trust me, super vampire speed and strength still means nothing when you see your little girl flying through the air towards you. Well flying through the air period! But when Alice and I decided to join them out in the yard to watch them play, Emmett picked up _my _daughter and **threw **her at us. I am not one to loose control over many things but I'm sure even Esme would have lost her sweet nature at that! In fact I'm sure Mom will be very interested to hear what he boy had done once she gets back from her hunting trip with Dad. … _Mom, Dad, I like that_. Its nice to really be apart of the family and finally belong somewhere! But anyway, I am feeling calmer now and I think its about time to go and find Edward so we can figure all this out.

"Bella! I know you want to find Edward but I think you should wait just a bit longer." Alice said for the 5th time.

"I know you keep saying that Alice… but I feel fine now so why shouldn't I go find him now! I don't see what the big deal is. So Edward has a secret, I'm sure its not as bad as I thought and you were the one that said that I shouldn't jump to conclusions, right! Why should I wait?"

"DADDY!" Renesmee squealed from across the yard from where Alice and I were watching them play.

I watched as our daughter ran from one side of the yard across to just behind Alice and I straight into the arms of the most beautiful man on this earth. He had a huge smile as she jumped into his arms and hugged herself as tightly as she could to him. She was so cute and he, _like us all_, adored that! He held her close as he continued to walk into the yard and my unbeating heart melted when he came so close and placed a gentle kiss on my lips.

"Hello, Love I missed you. You as well, my adorable Angel!" Edward said as he held our child in his arms and smiled down at where I sat.

"Hey Bro!" Emmett yelled from across the yard where Renesmee left him. "Can I have your daughter back or not? We were kind of in the middle of a game here Dude!"

"I see, well as long as you don't give my wife anymore trouble then sure." Edward responded as he let her rush back to the game.

"OH COME ON! … How did you know so soon! It wasn't that big a deal anyway. She caught her right!" Emmett babbled.

"Emmett! … If you ever even think about doing that again I will THROW YOU!"

"Bella there is someone here that I would like for you to meet and well she kind of needs my help. I couldn't turn her away and I promise that this will have no effect on our family." Edward announced suddenly.

"I know, sort of… Her name is Zatira and she's a friend of yours."

"Well Gee Thanks for filling in everyone Alice! … I guess you know why Jacob is pissed now then." Edward hissed at his sister.

"I DIDN'T! But thanks for assuming it was me anyway, Edward!" Alice snapped back.

"What do you mean, Jake is pissed! … Pissed at what!"

"You didn't? … but then how did you know all that Bella?" Edward asked.

"On our way home I used my powers to hear you when I was close enough but I heard her first and I was a little confused and I overreacted. So we came here instead. Now what happened to Jacob!"

"OH. … Well umm He's not too happy with me at the moment but that's another story first I would like you to meet Zatira and her daughter. Edward rushed to explain.

As soon as he said her name a slight-slender women, vampire, with long brown hair and dark black eyes stepped out from the trees and wrapped in her arms was a small and very young human child. I couldn't believe my eyes and yet some how I couldn't do anything but see the irony in the scene that was laid out before me. The child was clinging to Zatira and she held a protective yet defensive hold on the child. This child was very pretty and had lovely blue eyes and blond hair. She was so scared but not of the vampire holding her, she was scared of the rest of us. _Couldn't blame her _… I'm sure she has seem many others that _haven't _been trying to protect her. She was young for a human but this left me thinking that it wouldn't be so long before Renesmee was this size and even sooner still that she will grow past this child's age.

"Bella, This is Zatira Rose and her _daughter _Misha. Misha wasn't born of Zatira but she has raised her from birth. Even though she was a human child Zatira wanted to protect Misha and keep her from harm. I met her and her mother many years ago and they helped to save me just as I must help to save Misha now." Edward explained.

"Who is after them? What do they want with Zatira?" Alice asked.

"Oh, this is my sister Alice and over there… That's my brother Emmett with my beautiful and adorable daughter Renesmee!" Edward pointed to the kids at play. "Alice, there is a small group of covens that Zatira lives with and the oldest vampires of this group are the Elders. They don't tolerate any of our laws to be broken much like the Volturi but they only deal with their groups. These Elders there's only two of them and they are very powerful."

"So they want Zatira because of Misha. Since she can't turn her they would want …. Edward we can't let them do that! Its not right, she is just a child. How could they even think of that?"

I was going a little crazy but with the day I have been having I'm sure it could be worse but still Misha is just a child and the rules for this sort of thing in the vampire world is so harsh. If they find her the will want Zatira to harm her daughter we can not allow this. I will not allow that to happen! … Edward wrapped his arms around me tightly and kissed my checks, each one twice. Then he smiled at me and that smile helped calm me down so I wasn't the crazy protective vampire I was a moment ago. _If it wasn't for Edward I fear there would be a lot more deaths on my record then the clean slate I now hold_. He would want to help her no matter my opinion on the subject and I loved him for that all the more.

"No one is going to harm anyone least of all a child as special as Misha." Edward said calmly.

"What's special about her daddy!" Renesmee asked as her and Emmett joined the rest of us to get a better look after my simple outburst.

"Well Nessie, Misha is psychic. She is very sensitive to supernatural forces. She's able to perceive people's unexpressed thoughts or foresee the future." Edward explained as he brought Renesmee and myself into his arms.

"So she's like you and aunty Alice? But she's still human that's cool! … Hi! I'm Renesmee you can call me Nessie if you like but mommy's not a big fan of it." Renesmee smiled and waves at our new guests.

"You were right Edward, she is adorable and she really did come from you! Its amazing that such a thing should occur."

"Thank you!" Edward and I said at the same time.

"Its not worth risking your family for!" Misha spoke for the first time that I heard.

"Of course, no one is risking anything. That's why we are not going to allow these rules to punish you for knowing what you know. We will help you and your mother. Misha your life is very special and is not to be tossed away as you seem to think your mother is doing to hers." Edward spoke to her and her thoughts.

"Misha! … Wait what do you mean tossed away Edward!" Zatira asked.

"Its nothing Zatira, Misha is simply worried about your safety." Edward answered her.

We talked back and forth about what it was that we should do. Should we hide Misha and Zatira here at the Cullen home, or at our cottage, would it be better for them to have a place of their own under a new name and life of course, should we involve any others in our pursuit to help them, what if these Elders come to Forks and find her what do we do then? … We talked for hours so much was discussed, plans were drawn, and time had passed to the point that both the little ones had long drifted off to sleep. Edward was holding our daughter and Zatira was holding hers. By the end of the night we all decided that Zatira and her daughter Misha would be staying with Edward and I because Misha trusts Edward already and the large group of new vampires may not be the best thing for her at the moment. We will hide Misha from anyone looking for Zatira and when Zatira contacts the coven she belongs to she is going to state her case for leaving the groups permanently. She isn't the first to leave with no reason but just to leave and venture out, this should be the easiest part. The hard part will be for Zatira and Misha to start a new life somewhere completely new and not to have the help of the covens, luckily they now have us the Cullens for help. A new addition to our ever growing, ever loving family!


	2. The pain of the past

The pain of the past.

This isn't going to be very long, just to explain the loose ends and the problem Edward had in his past.

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or any of that Stephenie Meyer does.

Edward's POV.

Well this has been a long day…. Much longer than I thought it would be. I thought my biggest problem would be waiting for my family to come home. I however did not anticipate having to find and rescue an old friend and her daughter from past problem. I had no idea that Zatira would ever really call on me again. After what happened last time … I know it all worked out in the end but even still!

~Edward's mind flashes back to the past ~

_I found her three years ago. This little child lost and abandoned in a run down house. She was so young so scared. I thought it was because of me but then she surprised me when she ran to me as I opened the door. She ran straight to me and started crying for her mother. I wanted to help her, I __**wanted **__to ran the other way! She was human and young and I was on my way out to hunt. I had been putting it off for a little too long and just standing there watching her cry was killing me. I tried to calm her down. I told her I would help her find her mother… How far could she be right! I was wrong, VERY wrong. I had no idea what I had just gotten myself into. I took the child with me and left the building that looked to be falling down anyway. I couldn't smell the sent of any other humans anywhere. Not on the child, not in the area, not anywhere. When I asked her where her mother went she said to chase the 'bad men' away. I knew then that this could prove to be more of a challenge then I first thought. Now I had to find her mother save them both and do all this while fighting off my hunger. If it wasn't for my guilt I wouldn't have even stopped my hunting trip to check who was crying in that stupid old house. But the sound of a child's voice made me freeze in my tracks. I couldn't leave her there, I couldn't! What if some other vampire found her or even some crazy human for that matter! The poor girl was barely five! Her mother tried to save her be leaving her behind but a child this small could never survive on her own. Not in this area not with what is really in the world. Monsters, monsters like me, worse then me! …. No, there is no monster worse then me. I hide what I am. I hide among them. Humans, I hide even among my family! I hide because what I have done in the past I could never begin to reconcile for my past. I am a monster and nothing I do now can change that now! But still this child needs help and I am all she has at the moment. So I followed the only other sent I could find. The scent of vampires. Her mother may already be dead if that's who she was chasing. Then again why didn't I smell __**her **__scent! It didn't matter I had to follow the scent but first… Some place safe. I hid the child and followed the scent. I found something surprising. I found a single vampire, a woman with long brown hair and a devil's smile. She had a fire going. Big with purple smoke rising from the flames. She had to have burned at least three bodies in that fire! When she noticed me she lunged at me but I was faster and had her pinned to a tree before she could even growl. I searched her mind to she if she knew the mother but what I found when I asked about the child was a shock. She was the child's mother; In a way. I brought her back with me to the child. She explained everything. Then _it_ happened! _

"Edward!…" Bella's beautiful voice called me away from my thoughts and as I turned to see my wonderful wife, I saw she was watching me with a look of worry.

"What is it Bella! What's wrong?"

I ran to her side and wrapped my arms around her. I didn't like that look on her face and with my mind so lost in my thoughts I really had no idea what had happened to put it there. I was looking around for any sign of danger or anything out of place that would make her worry like that but I found nothing!

"Nothings wrong, Edward. You just looked a little upset. I come to get you because Carlisle wanted to see you but when I saw your face I got worried. Is everything ok Love!" Bella asked.

"Oh, No its nothing then. Carlisle wanted me you said, well I better go see what he wanted."

Bella followed after me as I walked from the kitchen into the living room with the rest of my family. Carlisle and Esme had returned from their hunting trip a little while before. Bella, Alice, and Zatira had been filling them in as well as Emmett and Rosalie. My past was coming back and I hoped it wouldn't end the way it did the first time … mostly because I couldn't live with _**myself **_if that happened again how could I ask my family to! I know things would be different this time. This time we had help, this time I had my family with me and she had hers. Zatira would leave the groups and be done with it. Once and for all getting away from the over baring, righteous freaks that call themselves the Elders. Like the Volturi, the Elders believe they are protecting the laws of vampires but for their small groups of covens. In the end all these vampires are doing is punishing those they see fit to be killed. In the end innocent people get hurt and fear is in the air around them and everything they set out to accomplished.

"Edward! Ah Yes. I think we are ready to help your friends, Zatira and Misha. What a lovely little girl you have here Zatira." Carlisle said as we walked into the room. '_It could take more then just a phone call Edward. Do you really think it would be best to take Misha along with you? Esme could watch after her for Zatira while we run don't there to take of all the Elder's problems. It couldn't hurt to keep her as far from them as possible, at least until we are sure that they believe Zatira's story about wanting to leave the covens_.'

"I have to go with mommy." Misha looked straight at Carlisle, determined and brave.

"Now, Misha. I know you want to come but its to dangerous. These people are friends, they can help us and they won't hurt you Dear." Zatira said.

"Of course not. Everything will be just fine Misha. You have my word that your mother will return safe and then you both can go anywhere and be free."

"Safe … Like last time Edward." Misha's eyes took a sharp turn in my direction as she spoke to me, I couldn't believe my ears.

She knew But how! … No one knew but I guess with her little powers that she would. Its hard for me to know that she knew… She was just a child and she knew what I had done in the past. My past. For the first time in over five years I have been thinking about that day and now this child is throwing it back in my face as if she knew, as I did, that it could happen just the same. But not this time. I vowed that it wouldn't happen again. This doesn't change that. It will be different this time, this time its different.

"It won't happen that way."

"What does she mean Edward?" Zatira asked confused, she wasn't the only one that was confused by this little statement.

"Edward!… What won't happen?" Bella asked out loud as the rest of them asked in their thoughts, not to me but still it was there, questions, worry, confusion.

I couldn't look at any one or anything. I stood there staring out the window. I can't believe this is coming back to haunt me now. _Sure it makes sense but still_, of all days it has to be today. HERE, in front of everyone. _**My family! **_I swallowed my pain and slowly turned back to the small figure before me with eyes so intense. Misha has always seen through me from the moment she saw me she knew what I was but she also knew I would do what I could to help her. If only I could do more to help myself then maybe I wouldn't be the monster that the rest of them can't seem to see in me. But its there!

"There was a woman but she was young. She worked for the Elders. She wanted to be turned and for that she found them to beg for this life. They gave her a mission, promising that she would be turned if, … If she could get the child the Elders believe to be hiding with the vampire that escaped. She had agreed and left with the other vampires to reach for you, Zatira. She trusted the Elders she trusted the vampires she was with but when they found us, all those years ago, we had Misha hidden. They knew she was near but couldn't find her so they had to fight us first. The woman was sent to look for Misha while the others took care of us. She followed the direction one pointed I followed the woman but she found Misha by the time I had the vampire I was fighting finished. Zatira was still fighting so she didn't know I had left. She never saw the human. Before Shelly … _that's the woman's name I found out_. Before she could get to Misha I had to stop her but there was another vampire they had sent, this guy followed Shelly in the shadows until she found the girl. He killed her as soon as she found Misha's hiding space. I never heard his thoughts until it was too late and she was dead by the time I reached the place. Misha was still safe in her hiding place out of sight but clearly not out of '_sight.'_ I had this vampire killed and burned before Zatira came looking for Misha. I burned Shelly's body with the vampire, it was the only thing I could do at the time. I had to get Misha and Zatira out of danger before more were sent to the area. Now the Elders new that Shelly would be killed she was never meant to be turned just a means to an end on how to get the girl to trust the others but once she was alone they no longer needed her so she was killed sooner. I couldn't save her but at the time there was soon much blood … I…. I. I could control myself. I didn't kill that vampire _**just **_to save Misha it was all the simple instinct to kill. The blood made me loose myself and the need to kill grew until I found myself lunging at him and when I came to I was standing before a fire with the woman's body in my hand. … …"

It was out. I had nothing more to say, nothing more to hide and for all the pain I felt for that poor woman, the pain I felt for not only not saving her but for not caring when I first saw her made me feel like the true monster I was and now the rest of them knew the truth as well. Zatira, Misha, Alice, Jasper, Emmett, Rosalie, and worst of all Bella, Carlisle, and Esme the most compassionate people I know. The most heartbreaking to disappoint and here I was spilling my long time fear and _disgrace_. I let that poor human's life spill on the ground and I couldn't even care. There was blood and death and the _monster in me wanted __**more**_. I have hated myself for many years over the time I spent away from Carlisle in my early years but the pain I felt from that woman's death from how I acted was something I blocked for so many years. Now its back; Full force!

"Edward. …. There was nothing you could do for her, my son." Carlisle placed a gently hand on my shoulder, after THIS he still tries to comfort _me_! '_Don't put yourself through this Son_.'

"Edward. You saved my daughter! … How could you think that it was wrong? That vampire had already killed Shelly, you avenged her death. With out you, Misha would have been found Edward." Zatira held her daughter close as she spoke.

"The past is the past. Nothing else matters now but what you do in the present. Now you are a wonderful father and husband. You will help Zatira and Misha again and this time we all will be there so no one will be harmed." Bella insisted as she stole me from our father's hand and gently placed a kiss on my lips.

To my total surprise not a single thought was resentful or harsh, they all seemed to truly believe that this is an overreaction on my part the only thought that seems to understand is the one yelling loud and clear from my own thoughts. I knew the truth and for now it seemed that to be the only way to make amends for the past. For now I had a job to do. A slightly different way to amend the mistakes of the past. To do it right this time and with out any death. I went with Zatira and Carlisle to call the Elders, we made sure to use a pay phone incase they followed the call still. She was to tell them that she has found a new place, a new home apart from the coven. She will abide by the vampire laws but her actions would no long be on their hands. As for the human she was _supposedly _harboring … well she said that it was a child she found lost in the wood and helped to get her back to her mother. Which was true in many ways. This clearly didn't sit well with the Elders as far as them believing her. I couldn't tell from the call but since she was no longer under their watch it was ruled that it was out of their hand and she was free to leave the coven. I had a feeling that the Elders would be making a few calls of their own after Zatira hung up with them so I had Alice keep an 'eye' out for the Volturi. It was all I could to without getting too close to the Elders to see what their next move would be. Zatira and Misha however were more then ready to move on and find a new home as far from the covens as they could possibly get, _I couldn't blame them for that_. I had plans for an escape myself but mine wouldn't take me far from home in fact it was home that I couldn't wait to get back to. Bella and Renesmee were waiting back at the Cullen house with the rest of the family, when we got back Misha ran off with Zatira after saying her goodbyes to my daughter. Misha and Renesmee couldn't be more different and yet so similar but still like all children the differences didn't seem to matter. They were like close friends playing games and sharing hugs, it was nice to seem Nessie playing with someone closer to her own age, even if its not the age she looks or even acts for that matter. Still it was nice to watch them play but I just wanted to take my family and head back home to relax. It was getting late and Zatira had left a little while ago so I wrapped Bella and Renesmee in my arms and we ran back to the perfect little cottage in the woods. The perfect gift for my happy family, even if the happiness is only a thin cover for the suffering and pain that hides just below the surface. Today was a reminder of how easy that cover can be cracked and the grief spill through, the pain can ruin everything this happy life had to give to a monster like me. Bella and the others they don't see it yet _but its there! Its buried __**deep down**_! But _anything _can happen, the past comes **back**.


End file.
